Double-crossed!!
A play with three characters in eight scenes.
Originally written for a private site now being made public.
Prelude:
Mary Beth and her roommate, Jacki have an odd living arrangement. Both are
single, however Jacki has been married twice. Mary Beth never does well with
men, partly because she is very shy and homely with buck teeth. This living
arrangement is a definite mismatch. Mary Beth is homely and shy, afraid of the
world. Jacki is not afraid to use her youthful good looks to have a good time.
Both advertise for roommates at the library where Mary Beth works, getting each
other as the only reply. Basically, they only thing they have in common would be
the fact they are both girls.
Mary Beth's former room mate has just moved out of the apartment. Jacki is fresh
from her latest divorce from a marriage that lasted only three months, ending
when she is caught cheating. Neither can afford an apartment on her own, so they
decide to give it a shot on a month to month basis at Mary Beth’s two bedroom
apartment.
Mary Beth, pushing 40, is a librarian who needs her long hair to feel feminine
and youthful. Her plain, whitened tresses are stick straight and coarse in
texture, usually worn in a large chignon or high bun wound over several times at
work. However, if her hair is left to be free, the length would cascade down her
back, past her waist, and down towards her knees, worn this way in the privacy
of her bedroom. She dresses in frilly long dresses; lace up boots, and wears
thick glasses. She very seldom goes out and has no night life. She longs to
someday have a normal life married to Prince Charming, wherever he may be, but
realizes she will probably spend life as she is, single. She sees this new
living arrangement as a chance to meet a new friend, but things are not
progressing as she would like.
Jacki is a 25 year old hair stylist, a brunette with a flair for partying. She
barely tolerates Mary Beth and her sedate lifestyle. Her darker hair is no match
in length to Mary Beth, ending a bit above her waist. Jacki's usual style of
dress is one of miniskirts, hot pants, and the ever present string bikini when
lounging at the pool. Jacki's hair is full and lively, she loves to fling it
about to gain attention from men. She'll take any man she can, but really wants
the one that caused her to leave her marriage. He has money and clout, he's 15
years older, and is quite handsome. He showers her with lavish gifts and
attention. There's one obstacle between her and spending the rest of her life
with this prince and his fortune, he has an infatuation about cutting hair. Her
hair.......
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Scene 1, Apartment pool, on a summer Saturday afternoon.
Jacki and her boyfriend, Max, sit at a table beside the crowded apartment pool.
Jacki wears a pink string bikini and is brushing her hair. Max looks on.
Max: (looks longingly at Jacki's hair activity), Come on, you don't need all
that hair.
Jacki: I'm a stylist. I have to look ravishing.
Max: I can make you even more ravishing. A pixie with bangs cut during a
passionate round of sex in your bed.
Jacki: (Laughing), Like you could do both at the same time.
Max: Let me cut your hair and I'll show you the life of a spoiled princess!
Jacki: (Walks over to him, sits on his lap, facing him, legs spread.), Let ME
show YOU how to have a good time, prince, and you'll forget about this hair
cutting fantasy you have.
Max: (Smiling), How about ME giving YOU a haircut while you're tied to your
bedpost followed by the most fascinating art of lovemaking known only in your
wildest dreams, rolling around in your shorn hair?
Jacki: Don't start, Romeo. You're not cutting my hair. (Jacki goes back to her
lawn chair on the other side of the table.
About this time, Mary Beth walks down to the pool with a book. Her white hair is
loosely tied behind her head as she wears a white sleeveless top, yellow Capri
pants, and white sandals. She sits on a lounge chair, opens her book and reads.
She’s fairly oblivious to what’s happening around her.
Jacki: (sigh), Oh, my, if it isn't Miss Frumpy herself.
Max: (Looks at Mary Beth), So, that's the new room mate, huh?
Jacki: Afraid so. What a stick in the mud!
Max: The reason we can't use your place.
Jacki: She never goes out! I can't get rid of her! Her idea of a date is ....
Uh, well, I don't think she has an idea of a date. (Laughs)
Max: (Laughs along), Typical old maid librarian. I wonder what those types are
REALLY like if get them wound up?
Jacki: Go over and ask, Stud Puff! She might even stutter you some sort of goofy
answer. Been there three months and she's NEVER had a date, a phone call, a
visitor, anything!
Max looks at Mary Beth again. He notices her loose, tied back white hair. Mary
Beth takes down her hair to brush it. Max is in awe over the length of hair that
drops to her lap. She winds it back on top, this time tighter. She divulges back
into her reading.
Max: (Turns back to Jacki), She has possibilities.
Jacki: (Laughs again), No, she could bore a piece of wallpaper off the wall.
Max: Really. Put her in a nice miniskirt, get rid of the glasses, fix the teeth,
add a little make-up, and let me cut some of that hair.
Jacki: MY room mate? Right, HER wear a miniskirt? What you see now is as much
skin as you'll ever see. Her thighs and midriff have NEVER seen the sunlight!
Max: (Sighs.)
Jacki: (Ties her hair back into a ponytail with a scarf.), Come on, let’s find a
place a little more private.
Max: Like your beauty shop?
Jacki: What, so you can tie me down and cut my hair? No, I'm thinking more your
place.
Max: I'll settle for being an audience while you cut someone else’s hair real
short in your shop while they're tied in your chair.
Jacki: Yeah, right. You provide a willing subject and bring her to my shop and
I'll even let you finish the job yourself. (She looks at Mary Beth reading).
Max: (Big grin), Promise?
Jacki: (Exasperated) Promise, if you promise ME you'll forget this fantasy you
have with cutting MY hair!
Max: Deal! (Looks away), Now, if I could just find a volunteer.
Jacki: (Looking at Mary Beth.), Man she even gives wall flowers a bad name! (Sly
grin overcomes her and in a barely audible voice, staring in Mary Beth's
direction), Mm, I wonder.... Yes, I know just the girl to get this fantasy out
of his system.
Max: Say again?
Jacki: Oh, nothing.
As they leave, Jacki takes another long look at Mary Beth.
Scene 2, Apartment kitchen, a week later.
Jacki stumbles into the kitchen where Mary Beth stands in her robe by the
counter, eating a pop tart and listening to easy music. Her hair is damp, freely
cascading about her thighs as she moves to the music. Jacki has a hangover from
another wild date with Max.
Playing from the radio: I'd like to teach the world to sing in perfect harmony.
With apple trees and honey bees and snow white turtle doves.
Jacki: (Turns off the radio), You gotta be kidding!
Mary Beth: (Stops swaying to the music, but her long hair swings a little from
the momentum), What's wrong, Jacki? Don't you like anything about me?
Jacki: You need a life.
Mary Beth: I have a life, just not as exciting as yours.
Jacki: (sneers in Mary Beth's direction), What? Reading romance novels in your
bath robe and listening to old lady music is life?
Mary Beth: Well, I AM a bit older than you, Jacki. If you don't like me, why do
you stay?
Jacki: (Under her breath), I wonder that myself. (Louder), When was the last
time you had that hair of yours cut and styled?
Mary Beth: There's nothing wrong with my hair.
Jacki: Come down to my salon and I'll cut and color it for free. We'll cut it
short and add blonde highlights. I'll even take you to get a decent dress made
sometime THIS decade!
Mary Beth: I've been growing my hair since I graduated high school. I see no
reason to cut, style, or color. I'm happy with my look.
Jacki: (Smiles with an evil grin), What if I told you Max has a friend that
might be interested in you if you spiced yourself up a little?
Mary Beth: (Smiles), Really, he does?
Jacki: (Knowing she's made an impression, continues, smiling), Why yes, but we
need to make you more hip so he'll fall for you.
Mary Beth: What do you mean?
Jacki: First, show some skin and wear some modern clothes. Second, lose the
glasses and fix those teeth. Third, quit living like an old maid and let loose!
Forget the easy music and get into some rock! Last, get rid of all that hair.
Mary Beth: (Pauses a bit, then answers), I would never feel comfortable in a
short skirt and I can't see without my glasses. I could never cut my hair,
either.
Jacki: (Exasperated) GEEEE!!! Come on, do you want to spend your life an old
maid?
Mary Beth: (Dejected), No.
Jacki: Then get with the program. Come with me to my room.
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Scene 3, Jacki's room.
Jacki: (Hands Mary Beth a short black skirt), Here, try this on.
Mary Beth: Why?
Jacki: Just do it.
Mary Beth: (Takes off her robe, wraps her hair in a bun, and slips the black
miniskirt over her white panties.)
Mary Beth: Pretty short. If that's what it takes to be hip, I'm not interested.
Jacki: (Takes a white halter top with front draw string from her closet and
hands it to Mary Beth), Take off that bra and put this on so I can see where we
are.
Mary Beth: (Obliges and slips the halter top over her bare breasts. Jacki moves
to the dresser and retrieves a pair of white socks from the drawer.)
Jacki: (Hands Mary Beth the socks), Here, put these on. Being a Catholic High
School girl, you should be used to these. (Jacki moves to the closet and picks
up a pair of shiny black chunky high heeled shoes), Size seven, right?
Mary Beth: (Sits on the bed to put on the white knee socks.) Yes, size seven.
Jacki: Try these and stand by the mirror.
Mary Beth: (Puts on the shoes and walks to the mirror. She gazes at what she
sees), So, this is hip, huh? (Trips herself due to the high heels).
Jacki: (Walks behind Mary Beth), you are hip girl, just like you were eighteen
again, if only you would do something with that hair.
Mary Beth: Just what exactly do you think I should do with my hair?
Jacki: Well, this guy tends to really like his girlfriend's hair cut real short.
He told Max he saw you at the library and found you attractive. He said you
would look great in a super short style.
Mary Beth: What’s his name?
Jacki: (Thinks for a moment, shouts), Charley!
Mary Beth: (Surprised look, falling for the charade), He really thinks I'm
attractive?
Jacki: With a short haircut.
Mary Beth: Looks at herself in the mirror, facing a dilemma.), I don't know. I
can't cut my hair OR wear skirts this short.
Jacki: Yes, you can. Let's walk around the jogging trail dressed this way and
see how many looks you get from guys.
Mary Beth: What does THAT prove?
Jacki: It proves YOU can still attract men. Then we cut your hair short and
introduce you to Max's friend.
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Scene 4. Back at the apartment after a walk around the track.
Jacki: (Smiling), See, I counted at least five guys who turned their head for a
second look at you.
Mary Beth: Really? I didn’t see five guys. I only saw two.
Jacki: Trust me, they were there. Those two you saw in front turned around when
you walked by.
Mary Beth: They did?
Jacki: Let down that hair! You still have potential.
Mary Beth: (Takes her long hair from the chignon and lets it hang free.), Maybe
I can get used to the high heels and shorter skirts, but I'd rather not cut my
hair.
Jacki: Come on!! You HAVE to cut it sometime! You have a guy interested in you
if you let go now! What do you say?
Mary Beth: (Sighs, runs her fingers through her hair.), I don't know. You don't
think this guy would be interested in me with long hair?
Jacki: Not a chance. Let me cut your hair this afternoon and I'll have you a
date with him by tonight.
Mary Beth: (Looks at the floor, her dilemma torturing her mind.), Ok, cut my
hair.
Jacki: Great! I'll go to the shop to get some things and make a few calls to set
things up for tonight. If all goes as planned, I'll cut your hair when I get
back.
Mary Beth: (Tugs on the halter top.), I hope you know what you're doing. It took
me over twenty years to grow my hair this long.
Jacki: (Walks to the door to leave), Stay in that outfit and wait for me.
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Scene 5, The beauty shop.
Jacki: (On the telephone with Max.), Max, do I ever have a surprise for you
tonight!
Max: (Through the phone.) Really? You're going to submit to a haircut tonight?
Jacki: Not quite, but close.
Max: You found somebody who will let us cut her hair?
Jacki: (Shouts), You got it, Sugarplum!
Max: Who? One of your customers?
Jacki: No, my room mate.
Max: Her? The one with all the hair?
Jacki: The one and only stick in mud is waiting for us at the apartment in a
miniskirt and halter top so we can rid her of her crowning glory!
Max: Tied up?
Jacki: (Thinks about this forgotten detail), If you want, I can arrange that,
too.
Max: (Huge excitement in his voice.), When's the show?
Jacki: Be there in about an hour. I'll have her tied to a chair and half her
hair cut off and spread out over my bed. You get to buzz off the other half.
Max: Your bed?
Jacki: Yes, after we're done buzzing her head, it’s time to finish this fantasy
of yours by making love in her shorn hair.
Max: What are you going to do with her while we're banging in your room?
Jacki: (Laughs), We're sending her downtown.
Max: (Laughs in return.), Downtown?
Jacki: To meet a fictitious friend of yours named Charley. I told her this
friend of yours wanted to meet her if she cut her hair.
Max: (Chuckles), And she bought it?
Jacki: Hook, line, and sinker!
Max: (Silent, full of anticipation). I'll be there in an hour!
Jacki: OK, big shot! This is your fantasy. Live it and get it over with.
Max: (Shouts), Jacki, I'll make this worth your while!
Jacki: (Hangs up the phone.) Thank you, Mary Beth! I knew this living
arrangement would benefit me somehow!
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Scene 6, Back at the apartment.
Mary Beth: (Sitting on the couch, watching the discovery channel.), Well?
Jacki: (Turns off the television), Roomy, this afternoon things make a change
for the better.
Mary Beth: You set up my date?
Jacki: As soon as I cut your hair, he'll be waiting for you downtown at 5th and
Dudley.
Mary Beth: What if I change my mind about this haircut?
Jacki: Simple. It's off.
Mary Beth: (Sighs, a tear comes to her eye.), OK, I guess my hair's finished.
How short will you cut?
Jacki: (Drags a kitchen chair to the middle of the living room.), Short. Trust
me.
Mary Beth: How short?
Jacki: Real short! Sit here.
Mary Beth: (Sits in the chair). Are you sure we have to do this?
Jacki: (Holding a length of white rope.), I'm sure Mary Beth. Now quit whining.
(Puts the rope around Mary Beth).
Mary Beth: What are you doing?
Jacki: Don't ask questions, I know what I'm doing. Trust me.
Mary Beth: (Scared, worried look), I'm having second thoughts about this.
Jacki: (Tightens the rope.), Think here while I change into something more
comfortable.
Jacki leaves and returns in a white open front nightgown and five inch heels.
She takes the battery powered clipper and installs a guard. CLACK!)
Jacki: (Under her breath), I have fifteen minutes before Max gets here.
Mary Beth: I think I changed my mind.
Jacki: (Exasperated), Too late! I set up this scene and I intend to carry it
out!
Mary Beth: (Squirms, but can't free herself from the chair.)
Jacki: Sit still! How can I cut your hair when you squirm like a worm?
Mary Beth: Jacki! I don't want to cut my hair! If this friend of Max's don't
like me with my hair long, I’d rather not go through with it!
Jacki: Will you STOP whining?
Mary Beth: (frees her right arm from the rope.)
Jacki: (Picks up the battery powered clipper.) CH-Bang-mmmmmmmmm... is heard.
Mary Beth: (Freezes in horror at the sound made by the clippers).
Jacki: That's better.
Mary Beth: Jacki! Please stop!
Jacki: Can't. I'm in this too deep to stop now! (mmmm-shzzzzzzt mmmm-shzzzzt is
heard over and over from the clipper against Mary Beth’s long tresses on her
left side. Jacki sits facing Mary Beth in her lap to clip short bangs.)
Mary Beth: (Softly, in a mode of submission, her freed arm limp), NO!! (Softer),
No. (Whimpering) No, my hair, it’s ruined. (Cries) (Bzz. Shzzzzzzt mmmmm is
heard as Jacki continues. Clumps of white hair fall to Mary Beth's lap and to
the floor. Mary Beth is silent. Jacki gets off Mary Beth’s lap and stands behind
to clip the back.)
Jacki: Oo-oh, oh, oh, yes! He’ll love it! (Shzzzzt Shzzzzt. Several feet of hair
fall to the floor behind Mary Beth as she whimpers.)
Mary Beth: (A coughing sound), Ghuh! Gh-uh! Jacki, how short are you cutting my
hair?!
Jacki: Little boy short! (Shzzzt Brrrrshzzztt)
Mary Beth: Why? (gulp) Why- why so short?
Jacki: Because I have to.
Mary Beth: (pathetic whimper.) (Shzzzt, mmm, Shzzt. Jacki stands to Mary Beth’s
right side.)
Jacki: Let's stop a minute and catch our breath. (Jacki brings the last length
of Mary Beth's hair in front and brushes it out.)
Jacki: (Under her breath), Five minutes till he gets here.
Mary Beth: What?
Jacki: (Picks up sections of Mary Beth's shorn locks from the floor), Nothing.
Let me clean some of this hair off the floor.
Mary Beth: Aren't you going to finish?
Jacki: (Most of Mary Beth's shorn hair is draped over her arm, heading to her
bedroom.), In a minute. I have plans for that last piece.
Mary Beth: Where are you going with my hair?
Jacki: Just putting it on my bed. This isn’t your concern. Yours is to look good
tonight downtown. (Smiles the evil grin again from her room where she can’t be
seen.)
A knock on the door. Jacki returns to the living room. She stands with one leg
up in front of the couch, holding a long shorn section of Mary Beth's hair.
Jacki: It's open, Max. Come in!
Max: (Enters the room. He looks at Jacki and the length of white hair. Jacki
and Max look at Mary Beth tied in the chair with one section of hair left
long.). You are an angel, my love!
Jacki: (Hands Max the section of hair.), Your trophy, my love. The clippers are
on the table. Your fantasy waits!
Mary Beth: Who's fantasy?
Jacki: Don't mind me. Your fantasy is about to begin when you go downtown.
Max: (Takes the section of hair from Jacki), I've been waiting an eternity for a
moment like this! (Chi-bang-mmmmm) is heard again from the clippers as he
approaches Mary Beth.
Max: Oh. Augh! (Sits on Mary Beth’s lap, facing her. SHzzzzt Shzzzt Shzzzt
sounds the clipper as the last pieces of Mary Beth's hair fall in his lap. He
finishes, gives Mary Beth a short, sweet kiss on the lips.) Thank You! (With a
tormenting laugh, he gives the running clippers to Jacki.)
Jacki: (Shuts off the clippers to install a new guard.) Let me even it out real
fast so we can send her on her way. (Ch-bzzzz. Shzzzt Shzzt.), Jacki evens out
Mary Beth’s short buzz cut.)
Max: A masterpiece, Jacki.
Jacki: (Unties Mary Beth). Go, you're late!
Mary Beth: (Places her handbag over her shoulder, wiping the tears from her
eyes.
Mary Beth: Don’t I get to see what I look like?
Jacki: NO! Just get out of here!
Max: Wait!
Mary Beth: (turns around)
Jacki: (Takes her glasses.) We can't have Chaaa-rley see you with these Coke
bottles!
Mary Beth: I need those! I can't see without them!
Jacki: (Pushes Mary Beth without her glasses out the door.) Shut up and get out
of here before he thinks you're not coming!
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Scene 7, All we see is the closed bedroom door.
Max: I can't believe you pulled this off for me, my love!
Jacki: All for you, my love!
Max: What do you think she'll do downtown?
Jacki: Make a fool of herself. After she finds out there's no Charley, I'll need
a new place to live.
Max: No problem, you're coming home with me and living in MY apartment!
Jacki: I can move my stuff in under an hour!
Max: Come to me!
Jacki: I'm here. (mmph. mmph.)
Max: Wait... Got hair in my mouth........
Jacki: Oh! Oh!
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Scene 8, Downtown.
Mary Beth stumbles about downtown. She's constantly feeling her new clipper cut
with her hands, wearing the black miniskirt, white halter top, and white knee
socks, looking for a guy that doesn't exist and not able to see a thing without
her glasses. She's tripping herself repeatedly in her high heels and making a
fool of herself by asking every guy she sees if his name is Charley.